Leah is Lazy Product Review: "Healthy" snacks

As part of my ongoing efforts to get healthier, I'm kicking off January with a detox. I've done a detox every year for the past three years, and the idea is to cut out all of the bad stuff and give your body a chance to cleanse and heal. I cut out booze, caffeine, dairy, soy, gluten and processed sugar for anywhere from 21-28 days and usually end up feeling great, having healthier skin, shedding some lbs and having more energy. The problem with it is that on Day 29 I usually go right back to pizza with a side of extra dairy and double gluten, and a pitcher of beer followed by an ice-cream sundae, please. This year, I'm planning on keeping it going for the most part past the 21 days. I will resume drinking on occasion (you know, "Because it's Tuesday! Huzzah!"), but otherwise I'm planning on sticking with the no-gluten, no-dairy, no-caffeine and limited sugar for the long term. BUT!!! Past experience tells me how this will end if I'm all "Will now be food Nazi. No! No! NO!" about it, so in an effort to forego the kneeling prostrate in front of the baked goods case at La Boulange while gently weeping and shoveling cheese danish into my piehole, I've decided to take a different tack on this detox. I'm still avoiding all of the things I should be, but "technically" I'm allowing myself some sweetness in the form of gluten free/vegan/dairy free bar-like items. (OK, I'm cheating. I have to cheat  MYSELF in order to stop myself from derailing my detox and plan for super-fit new me. How messed up is that? Whole other post). Now, I'm not going to detail calories, nutritional value or any of that, because I just care about getting something that tastes better than fruit does and makes me feel less deprived. Here's what my exhaustive research has come up with:

LARA BAR: Apple Pie

Taste: I hate nuts, but can sometimes stomach them if they're all ground up and you can't really taste them too much (almonds are sort of the only nut this works for, btw. Yes, I hate peanut butter. I know that makes people angry and astonished, but it's true). This was far too nutty for me. Gross. That was all I could taste. Aborted after first bite.
Consistency: Not bad. Like a regular bar.
Overall: Would probably be fine if you like nuts. 2/5

Lydia's Organic Raspberry Bar

Taste: OMG, this was a brick. Honestly, I thought I'd break a tooth trying to bite into this. Once I did, the raspberry flavor was pretty mild and not bad, but I can only imagine what kind of magical saliva you'd need to have to break this down. Now, perplexingly, the package says "Eat crunchy, or rehydrate", which I at first thought was a mantra for life or something (you know those hippies), but after my initial attempt at biting, I figured it was meant for the bar. Fine! Good to know. Um, except, except, HOW do you rehydrate? Because let me tell you, sitting at your desk and pouring water on the bar results in a pool of water on your desk and nothing much else it seems. I thought the website might be able to enlighten me, but no. Do you soak it in apple juice? Is there a rehydrator I know nothing about? Was I sick for that day of Goddess school when you learned about rehydrating snacks? I don't know, but I do know anything I have to work that hard for is not worth it. Binned after two bites. I guess I'll just go eat an apple. Jesus.

Consistency: SOLID! Solid as a rock. Maybe better once rehydrated, but come on now!

Overall: Big fat fail.0.5/5

BumbleBar: Chunky Cherry

Taste: Again with the nuts!! This one had the added difficulty of also having approximately a million toasted sesame seeds which make it taste even nuttier. It lived up to the name with huge chunks of cherry, but again, not too edible for someone who hates nuts.

Consistency: Weird. Sort of sticky. Actually, now that I think about it, it seems like a million sesame seeds held together with honey. The cherry chunks were a nice diversion.

Overall: Once you get past the sticky consistency, not too bad. 3/5 but mainly because I <3 cherries.

18 Rabbits: Cheeky Cherry Chocolate

Taste: I actually got this one in a gift basket over Christmas, and was pleasantly surprised. It does contain dairy, so no good for my current detox, but the nuts in here were barely detectable, the consistency was good and it was very satisfying. Not too sweet, even with the choclate.

Consistency: Great. Just like a trail mix bar. Substantial size also. Would be good for hiking.

Overall: Will do business again. They have a fig flavored one that's dairy free but not gluten free, so I'd like it if they had one that encompassed both, but can't fault them on taste. 4/5

Crispy Cat Candy Bars: Mint Coconut

Taste: TOTALLY like a candy bar. Delicious!!! Now, with 12g of sugar, it really IS a candy bar, but hey, no gluten! no dairy! This was formulated by a guy who used to be a big partier in Miami, but then became all healthy and whatnot and moved to Asheville, NC (of course he did! Not that Asheville's anything but awesome you know. The H/BF and I had a blast there one night on a road trip from SC to TN. Very cute litte town. Just basically like a Berkeley-like enclave in the middle of a very red state). I wouldn't say one of these a day is any better than a Twix a day, but if you want to feel like you're having something that is at least all organic and made with natural ingredients, this would be what I'd pick.

Consistency: Sort of like the crispy bits in a 100 Grand, only more condensed. Solid. Satisfying.

Overall: A++. Def. will do business again. 5/5

So, there you have it people! If I plan on making this eating healthier and working out thing a lifetime commitment, I need to face facts that occasionally I'm still going to want pizza, or La Boulange, or a loaf of bread, or a giant wheel of Brie, or candy or what have you. Taking the baby step to at least search out healthier candy is a start.

Let me know if you guys have come up with any other gluten free and/or dairy free picks that you like!

Moving forward, Looking back

So! That happened. Holidays and gift-giving and traveling, and hosting and eating too much, and drinking too much, and oh, the drinking! Oh, the eating! It seemed like 2009 just evaporated, and in reviewing, I feel like I spent so much of it waiting impatiently for it to be over. Sorry, 2009!! As it turns out, while you may have been a historically shitty year for some people, you didn't treat me half badly.  The first half of the year was spent preparing for and having a wedding:

Awwwwww! I CAN HAZ WEDDING RING NOW?

Then, once we got back from our honeymoon it was already June and, GAWD! can't I just have some time to not be planning a wedding and get back to normal?  The summer was a haze of returning to work, telling people about how being married is the exact same as not being married, baseball games and enjoying the sweet kiss of all the delicious gluten I'd deprived myself of so I wouldn't look like a heifer at the wedding and on the beach. Well, as it turns out, the sweet kiss turned out to be a total date-rape that left me all bloated and pudgy and gross-feeling by mid-September. Why, gluten, why? Anyway, the rest of the year was filled with the standards- work, travel for work, beginning to work out, neglecting my diet (WHAT? I'm working out now!), Mad Men Season 3, complaining about how fast the year was flying by while simultaneously waiting to be over the holidays and on to a New! Year! (pictured in my mind with jazz hands behind at all times), whic you know, would make my life different? Or something?.

So, here we are! January. In the manner of "The Secret" (which, they're making a movie? Jesus), I will now share with you all the things I envision for myself froma  workout standpoint and will make happen this year:

• I will continue with boot camp until I notice more positive changes
  Sure, there have been changes since I started working out regularly, but the sucky part about changing your entire body is that it takes time for your fat cells to get motivated to get gone. In their defense, they've had a nice long run of it and seem pretty comfortable. Where I had envisioned working out for three months as a Mucinex-level evacuation of any squishy bits, they're instead stubbornly hanging on, and possibly migrating to other areas in the hopes I won't notice.Let me reiterate, I've seen a lot of positive changes since I started working out, but, because it wouldn't be real unless I could complain about it, let me get that out of the way right now.
  Silver lining: thighs have definitely slimmed down a lot and saddlebags be-gone! Yay!
  Way to never miss the grey cloud: my thighs were never my biggest concern
  Light at the end of the tunnel: those squats have most certainly helped a LOT with my butt becoming its own separate entity, and not just a mass that seeped onto my thighs (hmmmm. Could've maybe chosen a better word than "seeped", but sorry, you're stuck with that image now)
  Oncoming train moment: fat from my ass may be stubbornly climbing to settle on heretofore not problematic "love handles"
  Exciting developments: Arms are certainly firming up and my back is showing signs of improvement also.
  Way to complain anyway: Um, the other flabby bits are still there. But getting less flabby.
  
• I will continue to work on my push-ups
  Kelly showed me how what I thought was a kick-ass (if assisted by my knees resting comfortably on the floor) push-up was in fact all wrong, so now I'm doing this variation where my hips are low to the ground and my poor little elbows flail wildly while I manage to depress myself about an inch towards the ground and scream in pain. This is the year I make push-ups my bitch.
  
• I will be less likely to give in when things are hard or boring or not fun
  Without getting all "Eye of the Tiger" on you, this is one thing working out has really helped me with. The H/BF and I have a running joke that if something is hard you should just quit, but I've mentioned before how I've been amazed by what pushing myself can do. Mental game and blah, blah, blah, feelings of pride, accomplishment etc. Which is a good thing to apply to everything really. Work is boring and not interesting? You know what? That's ok. Do it anyway. Just delve in and keep going and then your day is over and before you know it you've made a dent in your workload and you feel good that you didn't spend 6 of your 8 hours ensuring the Internet is still there. (It is by the way)
  
• I will start supplementing boot camp with other exercise
  Sneaky, sneaky exercise! I started off thrilled by making it to class three times a week. And I still am, but gradually all those damn endorphins and the changes you start to see really do start to become something to look forward to. Then, before you know it you're thinking "maybe I should take a yoga class on Tuesday/go for a short run/go for  hike/ride a bicycle" or something similar and that's why exercise is a gateway drug. When will I indulge all of my bad habits if good habits are trying to force their way in? Crap!
  
• I will start eating healthier more consistently
  See above re. gateway drug. I'm currently doing a detox (no booze, caffeine, gluten, dairy, sugar) and really want to keep a few of those habits going well past my 21-day finish line. Now, let me also add that if my metabolism gets crazy fast because I'm doing all this good stuff, I will probably enjoy shoveling Milk Duds in my face at an alarming rate again. But that's OK, because if I ever get to that level I DESERVE IT. Let me be.

And just because I can, here's what I hope to get done on a non-workout personal level for 2010:

• Try to be maybe sorta more tolerant and less easily annoyed and bitingly sarcastic about other people just trying to live thier lives. Even if that life-living includes any of the following: stupidity, mouth-breathing, flip-flops, visors, Ed Hardy, loudness, obnoxiousness or just generally being a douche. (Wow. In rereading that I realize I've just vowed to be nicer to the cast of Jersey Shore.)
• Be a better friend and correspondent. I'm lucky enough to have a lot of friends, some living far away. My letter/email-writing is woefully infrequent although I think about them all often. I plan to do more of letting them know that. For local friends that means more time, more involvement, more letting them know they're aces also. (That sound you hear is all my nearby friends heaving a collected sigh of "Eeeehhhhmm, what's this more involvement thing?")
• Hopefully get knocked up. There. I said it. GULP. Boy, it feels weird to think about getting pregnant on purpose when all your life you've been steadfastly devoted to the opposite. But, H/BF is awesome, would be a great Dad, we're all official and stuff, and somewhere between 30 and now my biological clock went from non-existent to powered by Timex and it just WILL NOT STOP. So there. Scary.

More on that later. I've still got those push-ups to conquer, that fat to blast, that eating healthy to start and also this blog to update more regularly.

By the way, this Workout Week in Review consisted of the following:
Boot camp x 3. I win!
Sweat x 1,000,000
Muscle soreness x 3 days of being crippled.

Not a bad start to 2010! Hope the same is true for you!

The Anti-Fit

As we all know, and my sources can verify, the average person gains between 5 and 10lbs during the holiday season. I know the stuffing balls, turkey slices, honeybaked ham, pumpkin pies, cornish game hens lathered in butter, yeast rolls, cheese plates, and desserts, desserts, desserts coupled with the feeling of abandon that usually accompany this time of year can pile on the pounds. Not so for me. At this time of year the biggest problem I have comes not from overeating, but usually from drinking too much.

I've tried to identify a few key reasons this may be the case. Here we go:

1. I'm Irish. Duh! I know that's not a true excuse, but I have to say that until you've been to Ireland and seen how much of the cultre is centered around the pub and drinking, you don't really know how second nature it is to us all. I have may thoughts on why this is so (a depressed nation, downtrodden for decades, a penchant for keeping emotions in tight check, a young population with historically few opportunities etc. etc) which I will espouse upon at some other time, but honestly, it really is a cultural thing. I grew up drinking. To quote Oscar Wilde: "Work is the curse of the drinking class". So true, so true.

2. San Francisco is a drinking city. It's true. It just is. And why not? We have awesome bars, great restaurants, and again a young population. A young population with disposable income.

3. Working at my company is like working at MTV Spring Break  sometimes. Seriously. Now, you kids with your Silicon Valley foosball tables and photo booths and skateboard ramps. You think you know something about partying? My company, which is NOT in  the tech industry, (I'm going to give you a hint, but if we were playing "Taboo" right now I'd totally be out. I bring this up because last time we played Taboo, the H/BF's cousin, who is a college professor and scary smart got frustrated when his wife couldn't get the answer with the clues "Actor" and "Bald", so he resorted to "Spruce Bilious", which is now all I will ever be able to think of Bruce Willis as. But I digress. Anyway, Hint: sounds like "endurance" and the industry is universally hated.) could really show you all some things. This past Friday was our Annual Employee Christmas Holiday party. I kid you not when I say there are numerous locations in the city we're no longer allowed at. But that's sort of what happens when you kick off your Holiday party at 9:30am with mimosas and shots of tequila. By the time the buses had all arrived at the venue with our 400+ employees, quite a few people were well on their way to being full of good cheer and a level of friendliness that would be considered inappropriate at some orgies. Then the booze flowed freely until 5:00pm, where we moved on to the all expenses paid "After-Party", because apparently we're shooting for the one day where we'll reach a "FlashForward" level of blackout and the entire company will lose the exact same amount of time and see the future or something. And this year was tame. Really. This is a company who, in a belt-tightening move installed a fully stocked bar in every office to cut down on our Happy Hour costs.

So, anyway!  at our Holiday party I was speaking to our "Wellness Coordinator" (of course we have a wellness guy whose entire job is to effectively try to counteract the rest of the culture a little bit. That's just smart planning right there) about how working out is such a departure for me and one of the things I'm really enjoying is the feeling that even if I do everything else wrong on a particular day, if I've worked out, I've taken the time to do something good for myself. And it's true. Even with this season of overindulgence, the days I make it to a workout are better than the days I don't.

Plus, there's always January, right?!

I'm back baby! I'm back!!!

OK, so I must say that even though the two week hiatus killed me, I have noticed two benefits to not starting completely from scratch with the working out thing:
1. My pain level has never ratcheted back up to the levels that I had when I began. Now, let me reiterate, when I began I frequently looked like this in-between and during workouts (only, you know, without the jaunty scarf/camo bandage, because that would have required me moving my arms) :

2. It actually seems like maybe it's not taking me as long to get back into the swing of things. I can already see improvements when getting back to some of the moves that are painful/impossible (i.e) burpees, pushups, jogging, squat thrusts, kettle bell lifts and on and on ad nauseum.

Truly though, the biggest boon of working out and the thing that drags me out of bed on rainy and cold  mornings  is the feeling of virtuosity. Don't underestimate it. Everyone loves feeling self-righteous and like a badass, right? No? Just me? Just me then. But seriously, the feeling of being somebody who "works out" (even a measly three times a week) is something I'm very enthralled with. It's the possibility that I can be a better me. That maybe, buried under the layers of stuffing balls and cheese and Milk Duds, my body and my strength can surprise me. Can be shaped into something I'm proud of, something strong and lean and muscular. Something I may still need to do the post-wash jeans dance for, but something that's nonetheless strong and healthy.

I've spent a ton of my life worrying about "weight". I know, I know; alert the media

Breaking news.....

but honestly, as I've gotten older, I've just grown weary of beating up on myself. Life is hard enough, you know? We're all doing the best we can with what we can. Sometimes the best you can do is a Filet-O-Fish. And I'm not going to launch into a diatribe about how we're bombarded with unrealistic images of what a female body should look like (but even Tom Ford, (btw, ahhh, so beautiful Tom Ford. DO WANT!), in this great NPR interview http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=121405891 talks about how we're all evolving to look like post-human people, basically because we can now with surgery and eventually we'll all be like beautiful cars, but who wants to be with a beautiful car?) because really, at the end of the day we should all just be kinder to ourselves. Whether that means mac and cheese to you, or whether it means "nothing tastes as good as skinny feels" (which, HELLO? Crock of shit. Um, steak, veggies, fish, chicken, dessert! It's all amazing!), we all encounter enough hardness in the everyday world what with routines and relationships and jobs and kids and pets and bosses and Big Brother coming back three times a week and whew! If you can't show yourself a little love in there it's not much of a life.

I myself used to come down firmly on the mac and cheese side of life, but I've discovered that balancing it with a little genuine feel-goodedness about lifting and pushing and sweating and kicking makes it all even better, which is a shock. (My initial thought was makes it all even "cheesier", which is apropos given my ham-handed imagery (see what I did there?!?! Thanks! I'm here all week! Don't forget to tip your server) and overuse of thoughts within thoughts, but you know what? It's my blog. I can ramble away!)

Anyway, in desperately searching for an ending here before I derail myself even further, working out = guilt-free McDonalds Filet-O-Fish and feeling of awesomeness (different from the McFeeling the FoF will produce)
And also, working out + genetics =

Able to eat Filet-O-Fish nonstop

Oh, it's all so much....*exhausted sigh*.....(Now with more CAPS LOCK!).......

Wow! So this is daunting. Picking up in December when my last blog post was in October. So, um, what have I been up to? Here's a brief synopsis:
Being crazed at work, traveling for work, traveling for Thanksgiving, stuffing myself full of food and wine and good cheer and tidings of expanded waistlines and not exactly comfort or joy.

November was a terrible month for working out due to my travel schedule which had me out of town for two weeks in a row. Again, yes of course you can work out if you're not in town, but my ALL-OR-NOTHING mentality doesn't process that too well. That's been a challenge for me with everything in my life, so not sure why it would be different with working out, but let me tell you that first day back after a two week hiatus nearly killed me. I can honestly say it was the closest I've ever come to throwing up in class, and everything seemed EXTRA HARD, when in reality it was just the fact that building up a fitness level is so easily undone. Even my (pathetic) sit-ups were impossible; mere weeks before they'd seemed like a nice chance to have a seat during a grueling workout.

So now, on top of battling my holiday-infused waistline, I'm also battling to get back to the very mediocre level of fitness I was at pre-two week layoff. Such is the cruelty of working out. For every step forward, every day you sit on your butt and don't try to improve upon it is a swift slide backwards. I could make some lame analogy about how everything in life is like that and it's a great lesson to learn in relation to your physicality, and as Jane Fonda used to say......blah, blah, blah, but in reality it's all very demoralizing. It does not at all feed into our FASTERFASTERNOWNOW mentality. I mean, everything in life is unbelievably easy with all the technology we have nowadays. Think about it - you can be on your iPhone trading stocks while blogging and getting a recipe for a simple paella and then hear a song you don't know but are intrigued by. In the olden days, we luddites would have to debase ourselves by walking up to friends and strangers alike and attempting to hum the tune to a song we didn't know. Then began the endless guessing game and the never-ending frustration. We must have looked a little homeless and crazy, wandering around, hugging ourselves and humming the same 15 seconds of the hook we remembered while saying "I think it was something something dogbone. No? You don't know it?" Now, you kids don't know what off-key humming even sounds like anymore. You just hold up your iPhone and SHAZAM!, your phone tells you everything you ever wanted to know about the song, and by the way, I've just downloaded it for you too. No, no, you're welcome! Don't even mention it.

Hence the jarring shift that comes from working out after decades and decades of doing nothing. NO instant results. As a matter of fact, it's essentially been the opposite. I've actually gained weight since I started working out. And don't tell me about how muscle weighs more than fat. Yeah, got it. I'm pretty sure my muscle won't squeeze over the top of my jeans like this. And in reality, I'm not one of those girls who ties everything to a number on a scale, but when clothes fit in different ways than they did before (both on the good and bad end of that spectrum), I tend to notice. So tell me then how this math works:
No exercise  + eating pretty much whatever = Less than ideal
Some exercise  + eating pretty much whatever three months later = Less than ideal plus some

See? NO FAIR! Everything else is so easy I want three workouts a week to be enough to get me fit and healthy, and I've just got to face it that for me (and most people actually), it won't be. I need to step it up and make it to every bootcamp and then supplement with some additional exercise. I need to not see working out three days a week as a license to eat everything I feel like. I need to remember how hard it was for me to go back after those two weeks and essentially feel like I was starting all over again.

On the other hand I also need to remember how my arms feel sleeker and more defined, how my push-ups are getting better, how I feel really accomplished when I complete a class and I'm covered in sweat, how we laugh as we stretch out to "The King of Pain" or how maybe, just maybe, it actually means something to put a little effort into taking care of myself and it may be better when I get there and know that I earned it. You know, the victory of finally learning what that song you were humming is seemed a little sweeter when you had to do more than push a button and get all the answers. I think Jane Fonda said that.

Workout One-Day Week in review - Week 5

Oops!! This workout week (and by week, I mean "Monday") brought to you by the Bay Bridge FAIL. I worked out on Monday. It was actually pretty good. I managed consistent 30-second sprints, I did some complicated kettle-bell lifting, I may have completed an actual push-up (I sort of blacked out, so I'm not sure, but I was still in plank position and my arms were wobbling when I came to, so I think I did it), I gave the old abs a good once-over and I felt sweaty and inspired coming away. Then the Bay Bridge CRUMBLED INTO THE BAY on Tuesday, Well, not really, but my confidence level is such that I feel it's only a matter of time. Fear of dying while going to workout (oh, the irony! And no makeup and yoga pants? Not the final look anyone would choose for oneself I'm sure) aside, the Bay Bridge has yet to reopen. This means that I have not worked out since Monday. Now, sure, all you sensible people are saying "But, you could work out in the city! There's a gym about 75 paces from your front door. A gym you've been a dues paying member of for nigh on 7 years now! Just work out there! Just walk home from work even! That's a 4 mile hike. Lots of it uphill!! Do it!" And to all you sensible people, I say SHUT IT! My workout regimen now consists of boot camp and feeling bad about not going to bootcamp when I skip it. That is all I can handle, people.

So, effectively this week was a total bust workout-wise. Here is a partial list of things I did get accomplished though:

• Took Miss Corolla to the mechanic and had her interior door handles fixed. Both the driver and passenger side door handles broke off. About a year ago now. And let me tell you, just getting in the car and opening the door with a handle instead of the complicated hand-out-the-window routine is a JOY. A sheer joy, people. I also fixed her brake lights, which "I swear, officer, I had no idea they were out! Or that license plate light! Who knew?"
  I don't know why, but doing something like taking my car in seems the very epitome of grown-up responsibility to me. I get the same feeling from buying stamps and having them on hand when somebody needs one.
  
• Made it through those two Netflix movies we've had sitting there since 08/04/09.
  Boy, that "Man on Wire" was a nailbiter, huh? I mean, even though the guy was sitting there narrating, so you know he didn't plunge to his death or or anything, it was crazy tense. And what a character. Totally "bat-sheet-crazee" as the French would say, but tres entertaining. And, by the way, does he have family money? How was this 20-something guy flying all over the world with his tightrope and entourage? Good flick.
  "25th Hour", a Spike Lee joint was meh. Good to see A-Paq with dark hair again, but really more of a mood piece than anything else. I was hoping for a little more resolution. And isn't Philip Seymour Hoffman just so greasy in everything? Yes, great thespian and all that, but he just looks like he always has halitosis and a proclivity to touch himself inappropriately mid-sentence. Also, Ed Norton.
  
• Finally left Etsy feedback on my recently received item.
  My first Etsy purchase was fraught with drama. The package didn't initially arrive, and the tracking said it made it to NY and then it disappeared. Then the seller was mid-move, so I emailed and didn't get an immediate response and figured I'd just been ROBBED BY THE INTERNETZ. Of course, everything worked out in the end and I absolutely love my little bird necklace. Her shop is temporarily closed, but please do go check out Joanna Rutter's work here for major cuteness if you're going through a big avian love affair like I am. A+++, will do business again.
  
• Bathed my dog and bought all manner of pet supplies at the pet-store, including Advantage, which, holy shit, you want $65 for?
  Leland does not like getting a bath. He stands there and shivers, all while looking up at you in a very resigned manner and with a face that says "Ladies and gentlemen, I implore you!". It's heartbreaking.  Then the head to tail shaking for 30 minutes thereafter is quite the production too. So, that's actually an accomplishment when we get him clean. Who knew he had a pink belly?
  
• Organized and made reservations for a group of us to attend this.
  Now, sure, making restaurant reservations is not that complicated but let me tell you, I had to first get everyone to agree to a plan, commit to a time, and actually follow through on going. Then it was sold out, so I ended up on the wait list, and had to call twice to get in. I'm exhausted and I haven't even had to get all Top Chef on anything yet.

Now, here is a partial list of things other people did that make my list (and yours) look completely ridiculous and made me sad:

• Obama salutes fallen soldiers
  Look, I understand this was just a gesture. A small one at that, but one of the things that truly resonated with me about Obama on the campaign trail was I really felt that he never portrayed himself as having all the answers. I liked how he held us all responsible for the State of America in his inaugural speech, and didn't make it seem like he knew how to change everything. At the end of the day, this was 18 families (out of thousands more, I know) that will not have their loved ones with them for Thanksgiving, for another Christmas, and I've got to imagine that at least one of those families is wondering what it was all for. To have the President acknowledge their loss and salute those soldiers in the pre-dawn whipping wind hopefully lends an air of dignity to their sacrifice and lets their loved ones know they mattered. That they still mater. To hear the President acknowledge that this affects his thoughts about sending 40,000 more troops to Afghanistan makes me feel heartened that we're seeing a real person who doesn't always know the right way to proceed, but will pause and consider before moving forward.
  
• A 15 year old speaks up and grows up faster than she should have to
  The utter tragedy of the Richmond High gang rape has been covered by many people far more eloquently than I ever could, but hearing school officials say things like "We'll redouble our efforts to ensure that this kind of behavior will not be tolerated." and hearing the Aunt of one of the suspects say "There is no way in hell I will see my nephew blamed in this because he is black." is just so indescribably wrong that it leaves me reeling. Seeing the 15 year old friend of the victim slam the school districtin the video above like she did hopefully means that the community is rallying around  starting a groundswell to eradicate crimes like this in Richmond, and everywhere else.

• Matthew Weiner created and writes for Mad Men
  Oh that Matthew Weiner! He's awesome. Mad Men is magic. If you're not watching it, you're missing out.

They're now saying the bridge will be closed over the weekend, so we'll see how next week goes. Until then, Happy Halloween!!

Eau de Icy/Hot

I managed to get back on that horse this morning and haul myself out of bed for a workout. I had a big weekend this past Saturday (yes, I crammed an entire weekend into Saturday.), and Sunday was spent lying around examining some bad choices made on Saturday (drinking Sauvignon Blanc at an outdoor festival? switching to Chardonnay when the Sauvignon Blanc ran out? not eating anything other than Mac & Cheese all day? (that one not such a bad choice, as it turns out), continuing to post-party after Treasure Island? Trying to jump rope in my  kitchen at 9:00pm? Really, self? Really? We should so know better.) and generally feeling lethargic and gross. By 10:00pm Sunday it just didn't seem feasible that I'd be able to get out of bed at 5:40am and go work out. It was not feasible, as it turns out. It seems I missed a quite horrific workout too. The words "pyramids" and "military" were thrown around in this morning's post-mortem. So, it seems like bad decision Saturday was maybe followed up by good-decision Monday after all.

My guilt at not working out on Monday was somewhat assuaged by this weird pain in my knee. Weird in that I would go to stand up, and my right leg would basically just bend backwards at the knee, sending approximately a kajillion volts of pain through my body. Weird, huh?  Anyway, this has been a sporadic problem ever since, which is definitely not good when you're stepping off the train and (hypothetically, H/BF!) trying to return the smile of a not-unattractive male, but instead of smiling, your leg shoots backwards in an ungainly fashion and you grimace in pain, all while mouthing some words rated for mature content, violence and some sexual situations.

I don't think there's anything seriously wrong with my knee (OMG! I so tore my PCL!! OMG! Probably liquid bone syndrome!!) but it's just brought home to me that if I had started working out years ago I'd probably be through this painful period right now. All the aches and pains that come along with using muscle groups never accessed before would probably now be a thing of the past, or I'd at least have a better grasp of what's "normal" for me, and what should have me rushing to see the liquid bone syndrome specialist.

As it turns out, my knee held all through my workout this morning, which is a blessing and a curse when you can't see through the sheets of sweat running down your face, and can't effectively wipe them because you're wearing boxing gloves. Another brutal workout. We did plenty of boxing and then got to "rest" with an extended abs session. So now my right shoulder hurts when I do anything too physical. You know, like pull up my jeans, or reach across my body, or carry my purse. At least when I wasn't working out, nothing hurt. When nothing hurt I felt youthful and able-bodied, and maybe a little mushy around the edges. Now I feel decrepit and sore and, hey! you kids get the hell off my lawn! But please pass the Icy/Hot before you go.

Shaq knows!